Managing An Emotional Bank Account

How do you manage your bank account?  Hopefully, you answered with balancing your deposits and withdrawals.  It's that simple!  This same idea applies to managing emotional bank accounts.  Your relationships with family, friends or a spouse are all emotional bank accounts in which you must manage in order to have a good standing.

People will sometimes forget what you say and do, but often do they forget how you made them feel.  So when someone is going through difficult times or trying to achieve something we must encourage one another.  Encourage one another daily.

Why is it that we know how to make withdrawals so well, but rarely make deposits? But first let's define the two and distinguish the difference.  A deposit is when someone gives or receives acceptance, affection, approval, appreciation or encouragement.  On the other hand, a withdrawal is when someone does the opposite by taking away something through rejection, hostility, criticism, condemnation or discouragement.  So what happens when you overdraw your bank account due to too many withdrawals and you haven't made enough deposits to balance the account.  Your account goes into the negative.  Well this is applied to your emotional bank accounts as well.  More deposits than withdrawals = positive healthier pleasant relationships.  However when your withdrawals exceed your deposits, your relationships go negative or even bankruptcy.

You treat others how you want to be treated.  So have empathy.  Put yourself in someone else's shoes.  Don't be apathetic or sympathetic, be empathetic.  I say be empathetic because you "feel with" the other person oppose to pity or disinterest for them and what they are going through.  You create understanding for if you were them what you would be feeling or going through.

Withdrawals deplete your emotional bank accounts and too many will cause your relationships to become tense and at risk for conflicts and misunderstandings.  The key to maintaining a successful emotional bank account is to be consistent with your deposits.  So listen, understand, be thankful, keep commitments, show support, be kind, considerate, show interest and appreciate.  Always remember that when you make consistent deposits you build up value in your emotional bank accounts.  From time to time we all make mistakes and withdrawals will happen but your reserves will compensate for the loss.  Love and forgiveness to all!